Out of the Ashes

"Well I fought with a stranger and I met myself. I opened my mouth and I heard myself. It can get pretty lonely when you show yourself. Guess I could have made it easier on myself. But I, I could never follow" Dixie Chicks - The Long Way Around I have never been one to take the most direct route in life and sometimes you could wonder how things could have looked if you did - or what could have been accomplished sooner - but then I guess you could say that if the route that was taken was not taken then  than would we be where we are. I think sometimes the best things in life are found on the journey...by taking a circuitous and unknown route in life and in that trying to find the way around to where I think I am going, and sometimes it ends up being nothing like I thought it would be. Yet, I have had the unique pleasure of meeting some amazing people along the way. I will say it isn't easy knowing where you want to be and yet taking a long windy approach to the

Ok, so the days have seemed to get away from me the last little while,  which I have been trying to not let that happen, as I believe time passes to quickly and we tend to forget that each moment we are given is in fact a gift. However, this got me thinking. We are given 1440 minutes each day and if we get the whole day that equates to 86400 seconds. I have been sitting here writing for 2 minutes now - which is 120 of those seconds. That may not seem like a lot of time, but really it is. I know time is relative to what you are doing though, for instance two minutes working on something important or being around someone your love, time can can fly by, where two minutes running can seem like a lifetime (am I right?!).... Anyway, breaking things down in my head a bit more - a realized that  I spend about 10 hours working each weekday and 2 hours at the gym 4-5 days a week - which when I am only awake for 17-18 hours a day, is a good chunk of my time in a week. That is  approx. 12 hours t

Who doesn't think about Leadership these days? Maybe not even realizing we do. There is good leadership, bad leadership, lost leadership and there are different levels that we fall short or strive to become better in our leadership skills. Regardless, we all at times time about leadership in different ways or on different levels and coming from many different circumstances, sometimes without even realizing we are. Some people are born leaders - some find there way there along the road. I might have been born a leader, but I am not sure because I did not embrace the idea at all earlier in my life, but now I am always finding ways that I need to improve on this front. I think it was always in me - but I never believed in myself enough to stand firm on that (and some days I still have trouble with it). I realized through my journey so far though, that a Leader doesn't need to be full of self confidence all the time, but they need to always stand firm in who they are and always

This could be one of those posts - and ideas I have like many that may continue to come up -this one in particular because well I have a blog and a tattoo with this mythical bird as the muse and a life that has been made new out of ashes several times. So, it is obvious - I love the Phoenix - it is my favorite mythical creature or idea that has come out of ancient folklore and has spiritual connotations for me that stick with me every day and remind me to stay grounded and keep finding my best self and seeking to help others find theirs. It is stated that this mythical creature will throw itself into flames and then will arise, reborn from it's ashes. This has always been a beautiful thought and idea to me and has allowed me many hours of reflection on the relevance in our own lives. How many times do we find ourselves throughout our lives, at the end of our ropes or at the end of what we believe is our limit. In a place where the only way sometimes to move forward is to throw o

I have been seeing a massage therapist this year pretty regularly this part year (by far the best RMT I have ever been to but that is besides the point). After my last therapy, she was talking about the Tensegrity Model with respect to the way that it works and moves. So, I checked it out - and basically it is this... Tensegrity Model " is a  structural  principle based on the use of isolated components in  compression  inside a net of continuous  tension , in such a way that the compressed members (usually bars or struts) do not touch each other and the  prestressed  tensioned members (usually cables or tendons) delineate the system spatially" [1] Apparently the easiest way to understand it is to get a model and hold it in your hand - which I can say is true ... you can then can watch the properties of the model for yourself. But the basis of it is that the model holds it shape as long as all the strings are intact. cut or over-stretch  a string (just one) and the sh

I have found in the last few weeks of my life - needing to understand not just my own, but others reasons for doing what they do : living for all intensive purposes. Well I can honestly say from the outside looking in on others lives around me - it can be a bit of a mystery. However digging into my own processes, thoughts, and life - I have come to realize that life is and has always been for me (albeit at different levels of emotional, mental, and physical strength) - about big picture goals and helping others. Coming from an introvert that can seclude into my house with ease - the later can be tricky and sometimes you need to get creative. By helping others - it can be simple - owning a store gives me the flexibility now that I didn't have before .... and also gives me means and opportunity to do something nice for someone I know. Money and things that are needs for people have always been something that can easily be given. Can put a smile on someones face and make people paus

 I have been wondering quite a bit lately regarding how it is possible to work as hard as I do sometimes and still feel like I am moving sideways,  in circles, or just at a slower pace than it feels it should. Because of this - I decided to start looking at how I address life's challenges. How I put my head down and push through some times when I don't feel like it. I find that when things don't make sense I try to make sense of them to fast and end up making less sense than I did when I started trying to make the sense in the first place. (wow that was a good example of what I mean). What I have come around to is this... when we hit moments in our lives and we find in ourselves needing to dig deeper for extra in ourselves - would it not be better to take a step back, or think from another perspective than we are currently sitting at. Thinking smarter can mean a whole lot of different things. This can be as simple as taking a break, going to work out, taking a walk, findi

July 7th - a completely innocuous day to most people (unless your birthday happens to fall on that date - then happiest birthday to you). A day that can come and go year after year without a thought - other than who doesn't like summer time... However - for me - it is a day I will never forget as long as I live - as it marks a complete change in my life - a switch from the comfortable and easy and into the unknown and challenging. The day I arrived to the little rock I now call home. I decided late in 2006 that I was going to to move to Victoria BC Canada after finishing my degree at the University of Western Ontario - from my hometown of London ON. A 4932km drive away from my family, friends, and loved ones to an unknown city full of possibility that scared me to my core. I followed a slight nudge from my heart to do something for me, so I did. Saturday July 7 2007 - I arrived here a scared and very young sheltered girl. Moving into a two month rental to try and find a job an

I like to call this place the beginning ... the first step on a life long journey - Find a way to believe in yourself - what you are capable of - and that you are worthy of your dreams. I think the biggest thing that a lot of us tend to deal with is the belief in ourselves . The main question I hear when talking to people (spoken or unspoken) is - if they are worthy of their dreams. So many people give up - because they are to afraid to ask themselves that very question, because it is just easier to - or they have had others tell them they are not worthy - either by their actions or outright ridicule. I struggled with this a lot in my life - and some days I still have to fight it - it never completely goes away. Remember, there are always people, situations, or your inner demons that want  you to fail or never try, or give up. I grew up as an oldest of two daughters in an very loving and good home environment (and I tell you this first, because it helps to  understand that the

How many times in life to we see flaws in ourselves - and if you are anything like me, you tend to see our own flaws in a magnified view. I over analyze so much about myself on a minute by minute basis. Critiquing so much more than just my body or my hair (as most women do) - but everything I do. I think that seeing our flaws is not a bad thing - but we must constantly be using them to make a positive difference in our lives - not drag us down. When you see something you want to do better or see something that you could work on - use that as inspiration to change that thing about ourselves. The take away we can get is this - instead of looking at your body and not being happy with it - take a step back - and see how you could make yourself healthier. I have come to realize that regular exercise and healthy eating can do wonders for our bodies and our minds. Being healthy is and always should remain our number one focus though. On another note - when you see something you are not do

At the start of this year I  was in a pretty big funk -- and I barely even admitted to my self until recently - however I am trying to turn over a new leaf and express myself - shortcomings and all to maybe help others or at very least myself.  I am mostly, at least on the exterior, a pretty tough nut and I keep a lot of my problems and emotions pretty tight to my chest - which is something that I am slowly trying to change in this venue anyway. So, along that line - I was just cranky all the time (for lack of a better word) and certainly not enjoying myself at all - with any aspect of my life. I was feeling overwhelmed and always exhausted. It had me loosing my focus as to what I do best in life and the passion that i have for what I do - not just with my store but my entire life. The negativity was crippling everything. I felt that I could not grab control of anything at all which had me extremely discouraged. I then met someone that through the way they lived and how much passion

If your belief in yourself was unaffected by past experiences or lost dreams - where could you take yourself? How would you deal with your day to day life differently? What would you want for yourself and your future? I have been asking myself this everyday for the last two years - finding new answers to it - and in those answers I find new deeper beliefs in myself and what I want out of my life!  You can get there - it takes commitment to finding yours  first though, outside of every though that has been implanted into your mind and your being ... There is no limit to what you can accomplish. But you must believe in yourself first and fully buy in!  Belief in yourself and your absolutes is paramount to your success personally and in business!. I urge you to start this journey today... I will be back with more of my experiences on my journey and it will hopefully help you start yours! For more on my past journey  - this blog goes back about a decade .... Showing parts of a scared

My thoughts have been recently trying to understand the differences between people - how some people seem to power through and have an incredible amount of drive and then others seem to live life in their comfort zone. Most people, if they have the excuse ready for why it justifies in their heads why they didn't or can't succeed. Of course, this can be seen from the other side as well -  you can't succeed if you always have doubts in your heads and reasons ready for why you can't accomplish something or if you never put the full weight of your own belief in yourself behind it. How could you ever expect to go past where you think you can go without your own belief behind it? I have been on both sides of this mental state and I can honestly say that they human mind (and it's belief in ourselves) is one of the most powerful tools we have. It can take our bodies and our lives past most things that get in its way. Positive thinking and an inner belief in yourself is ou

I have spent a lot of time thinking about writing again - but never really got around to it.  Partly because life has taken me so many new places the past 10 years that it has been since I last wrote (has it really been that long?)  10 years older (wiser?!) from 23 to 33 --life sure does fly by.  Looking back on who I was then and the wants, desires, and hopes I had for the future - the fears that I lived with every day and the dread I had of what may come. I can honestly say I am proud of myself thus for for who I am and what I have accomplished in life. As a person and a professional.  I am now a small business owner in Victoria BC. miles and miles away from a family I love and everything that was familiar and safe! My home and my family were comfortable and safe - but comfortable and safe was not going to get me what I wanted. I did all the growing up that London Ontario had for me ... so it was time to take everyhing I was taught - all my preconceived notions of my self (and